🔗 Share this article That Drifting Poo Was Way Too Symbolic! These Are the Television Letdowns of the Past Year. Looking back, we consider the television offerings of the past year, a handful of series stand out not for their brilliance, but for their spectacular failures. Ranging from awkward spin-offs to confusingly poor docuseries, here are the programmes that left us scratching our heads or just reaching for the remote. The 'Sex and the City' Sequel How to start with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with dreadful writing, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to justify its existence. For a moment, as the third series started, it looked like it had at last found its groove. Then came an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner announced this would be the last series. It ended on a bum note; the closeup of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was simply too on-the-nose. Still, viewers certainly had a hoot dissecting every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a small sob? All’s Fair ‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’ But that was practically the smallest of this show's issues. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon zero star assessment, it was difficult to know where to start listing the flaws. The hilariously wooden dialogue? The mind-numbing glorification of wealth and materialism? The almost wilful parade of cliches? Acting so poor they felt borderline malicious? Suffice it to say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. Except, a second season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to. AKA Charlie Sheen Considering the legal troubles, abuse allegations and fatherly failures, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d truly have known it from this multi-part docuseries which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of self-destructive excess while failing to tell us a single thing we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any sympathy this show might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charming but flippant narcissist. The Iris Affair Of course we understood it was preposterous from the get-go: a drama about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer admiration for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. That's what you call admitting defeat. MobLand Dodgy figures meeting in deserted boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back. Actually, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many look a little dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to accommodate unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other issues. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over drug-selling territory between various London rogues which seemed a bit basic. With Love, Meghan Given the extent to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s performatively angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s various forays into quaint lifestyle as deliberate statements. But then you watch them and are forced to concede that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a poster for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a parade of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by vast, largely unearned wealth. Ugh. The Beckham Documentary There are obviously fascinating things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this documentary series opted not to explore them. Instead, the experience was like reading a sales catalogue. She clearly has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she failed to do herself any favours with this cagey non-event of a series. The Inheritance It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players competed, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to emulate something far greater than it. Too Much How does one follow a show that captured a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The lead actress took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Jane Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of celebrity cameos involved felt icky. Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping Not good enough to be ‘uneven’. Given the smart inclusion of gifted younger comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A particular sketch was a one-note joke milked to a dry pulp but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have stayed in there a while longer. The Knox Dramatisation This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be handled with care. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right voice, lumbering from oddly jaunty, slightly mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Perhaps. A total mess? Absolutely. The Maths Genius Thriller We love the star … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could ruin society? No! This globe-trotting thriller about government agencies targeting – and killing off – academics frankly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers. 1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story This hagiography followed the online personality notorious for explicit escapades as she prepared for her most extreme challenge yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was way more interrogation of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who showed up to haul her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and zero critical analysis of her infamy whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the filmmaker has a teenage daughter too.