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One Side: One Friend's Perspective

At times she films me while I’m eating. It's jarring to spot myself on her social media – it’s like a sudden shock.

My best friend of 10 years, she, calls herself the “content queen”. It can be amusing for a short while, but it weighs on our relationship.

She is an extrovert, she feels the need to document everything constantly. When we eat out, her motto is, “The phone eats first,” and snaps pictures with the flash on, which makes me cringe. It's unpleasant when strangers see her performing for the camera – I get vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because the food gets cold.

She isn’t exactly an influencer yet, but she is aspiring to become one. She makes video blogs about living in our city, her daily routine, and her styling career. The material is quality, credit where it's due, but I don’t want to be involved. Sometimes she films me while dining, or simply tagging along. Later, I appear on her Instagram afterwards, and it pops up like a jumpscare: I might be bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured mid-bite. It’s uncomfortable.

She also anticipates that I will to record her at inopportune moments. Often I’ll be talking to another person, or we’ll just be spending time in the street. The dynamic feels like our friendship has turned into me serving as her free crew. She has the means to employ someone if she wanted professional shots. When I brought up my unease about the situation, she dismissed it. She’s taken me to several industry functions, which was nice, but that doesn’t make up for all the time and effort I spend helping her create material.

I appreciate that Marielle has helped me with my design career, but I resist our connection to become merely a tally of favours. I don’t feel she’s fake or dishonest, but at times I feel that if the camera is out, we will start performing in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

Her directive is, “Alright, smile for the camera!” and record me smiling with someone. It feels forced. I need her to recognize that our 10-year friendship still has limits. I love being with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being filmed, altered, or posted for an viewers. I am not a accessory for her Instagram.

The Defence: The Content Creator's View

I hope Beth to see that the creations we produce together can get us an opportunity.

I love shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it's integral to who I am. Creating videos and sharing my life online allows me to express myself and connect with people in novel forms.

I don’t see myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to make money from your interests. I look up to people on TikTok who execute that style of casual, DIY content creation.

Creating content is my version of engaging with life: observing the details, sharing them with an audience that values the craft behind it. It's never my aim to make Beth uncomfortable. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my way of offering access, providing her a chance to witness exclusive moments that could help her career in design too. That’s not blackmail, it's simply being pragmatic.

I would take her to such functions even if she didn’t help me, but I desire her to see the benefits the work we make together can achieve: an opening. I understand not everyone likes being on camera, but sometimes spontaneity is what makes content genuine. Being recorded occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I'd remove anything she asked, but she hasn't made such a request yet.

I don't demand anybody to be my personal filmmaker, but companions support one another in small ways. My assumption was filming a clip here or there would be fun for Beth. Creativity thrives in partnership, and having Beth around makes endeavors energetic and pleasurable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I’d never intentionally embarrass her. But filming together occasionally is part of how I document our time together.

I cherish our friendship deeply and don’t want making videos to drive a wedge between us. I’m willing to find middle ground: like requesting permission before filming, and steering clear of angles that might make her self-conscious.

This isn’t about control, it’s about sharing my world while still respecting hers. Clearly making content is not a substitute for real connection: it's merely part of how I experience life and I want her to be involved in a way that’s agreeable for each of us.

Outside Perspectives: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and Beth when they are out together?

There’s nothing more excruciating than having a companion point a camera at you. I get that it's her passion, but I wouldn't ask friends come to my work. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. With the dark, looming future of technology, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something as a career, it's unfair to expect your friends for help every time, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys shooting, that doesn’t mean all those around her is content. She needs to respect her friend's personal space.
Another reader, 26

She may enjoy producing videos and showing off her life publicly, but it’s not for everyone. It was kind she has helped Beth’s career, but she needs to listen to what her friend desires.
Emma, 27

It sounds like you care about each other, so cling to that and ensure it’s the focus in your relationship. Create some real experiences, where true emotions are preserved, not digital scrapbooks. Even public figures who seem to share their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
One opinion, 53

She seems to be neither present nor genuine when she’s with Beth – she's on the job. Both seem confused as to where the line is. The answer is not found in trying to alter one another, but in each establishing clear boundaries around what feels acceptable to them and seeing if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
A final view, 71

Your Turn to Be the Judge

Consider this question: has she been exploiting their bond?